Day Negative One

Days Since Last Cigarette: 0
Days Without Nicotine: 0
Dollar Saved: $0.00

I’m most worried about where my words will come from.

Up until now, I’ve been keeping them in my cigarettes. My working MO is basically to write until I’m out of shit to say; whether that’s a few pages, a few paragraphs, or a few sentences; then, when I hit a wall, I go outside and light up a cigarette until I have more words. I have no idea where I’m gonna find those words once I give up the cigarettes.

My hope is that this blog helps. I know a lot of people tend to avoid talking about smoking when they’re trying to quit, but I think the reflection will help. I’ll probably decide to change that cover photo pretty early on, but my guess is that spending a few minutes a day thinking about the process of quitting and trying to put it into words will help me continuously remind myself what I’m doing and why.

I’m not sure that anybody will give a shit to read it, but that’s not the point. I’m making it public so that anybody who cares to hold me accountable has another tool to do so, but the purpose of the blog is for me to have an outlet and a diary to look back over when I’m wavering on this commitment.

My first thought was to just do a series of posts on Facebook that would have been essentially the same thing I’m doing here, but it occurs to me that it might be useful to other people trying to quit to have my day by day journey archived for them to follow along with just in case their quit date doesn’t line up with mine.

Apologies in advance if the next post is just the word “fuck” with an excessive number of U‘s; but I’ll try to get more articulate as we go.

Pre-post

Well holy fuck; I guess quitting smoking can’t be any harder than setting up the simplest possible blog on Word Press. Jesus fucking Christ at this blindly stabbing bullshit. So if you don’t like the look of the blog, go fuck yourself. Talk to the jackasses at WordPress that went out of their way to hide how to do any goddamn thing with their shit system.

Fuck.

Day Negative One (Part Two)

Days Without a Cigarette: 0
Days Without Nicotine: 0
Dollars Saved: $0.00

I’ve gotta admit, the numbers are scary as hell. I’m a data driven person. I like to think of myself as a rationalist, and a big part of that is understanding the math. And 1 in 5 are shit odds.

From everything I’ve been reading, those are my approximate chances. About 20% of people who get serious enough about quitting to set a date actually wind up quitting for any real length of time. And I understand statistics well enough to know that doesn’t mean I just have to quit five times to make sure it sticks. Hell, the most the little booklet that came with my nicotine patches was willing to say was “nearly half of the people who use this patch are able to quit for a couple of days.”

I know the odds aren’t with me. But you are. And that helps.